also, how is kaiser's apartment comfier than his? hmph... he's not moving, though, unless he has to, because no will to live etc etc. trainings usually leave him sore and wanting to just curl up on the couch and watch matches until he falls asleep. such is the life of a boy with no hobbies outside of his one interest...
he'll appreciate a glass of water, though, sure, reaching out to take it from kaiser's hands and making space for him on the doomcouch. )
[ that means sae has tacitly agreed to the fact that kaiser is going to attempt to put an arm around sae and pull him in... therapy bunny time. he needs to hold his therapy bunny to cope with the continued agony of living, or else. ]
Are you going to show me the posts on your mind first, or shall I jump straight to begging? I'm all for the former, for whatever that matters...
[ kaiser is still trying to gather information on what kind of begging sae might be in the mood for. he needs to read sae's every microexpression. ]
[ kaiser knows better than to squeeze too hard before he begs sae to let him shove his tongue up his pussy... he knows that will never get him what he wants... he will curl around sae a bit and rest his chin on sae's shoulder, though. ]
Shouldn't you at least look at my beautiful face while I beg? I feel like it should help.
[ he's just kidding, he promises. ]
Besides, you're supposed to share the doomposts with me. Read out loud a good one, I want to hear it.
[ kaiser isn't online enough to understand about the ugly twins. ]
Who are the twins? You and somebody else? Or me and somebody else?
[ unfortunately, kaiser knows there are many other white blond european strikers out there... but he's hotter than all of them!! he's trying to glance over sae's shoulder now. what does this mean?? ]
[ it takes him a second, but kaiser understands this after thinking about it... he lets out a pronounced exhale of amusement, which is what he does when he's actually found something funny, instead of making a show of laughing as he would if he were faking it. is it sad that this makes him less suicidal because it reminds me that it's not as if things would be better if he were still playing for bm...
he's suicidal nonetheless, though. ]
Must be because both teams always seem to fucking bottle on the same matchdays this season... what, are you not paying attention to Bastard's fortunes now that I'm not there? Very flattering, Sae.
( but he's not actually that interested in following other teams because he's got his own shit to deal with. maybe if madrid was doing well, and there wasn't so much behind-the-scenes drama, he'd have time... but as is, he catches up on important matches after training and lets anything unimpressive rest.
which, noel noa is not unimpressive, but when he sees a 0-0, he puts the match on the low end of the queue, and then sometimes just doens't have time — )
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( but also don't because that's awkward as hell??
also, how is kaiser's apartment comfier than his? hmph... he's not moving, though, unless he has to, because no will to live etc etc. trainings usually leave him sore and wanting to just curl up on the couch and watch matches until he falls asleep. such is the life of a boy with no hobbies outside of his one interest...
he'll appreciate a glass of water, though, sure, reaching out to take it from kaiser's hands and making space for him on the doomcouch. )
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Are you going to show me the posts on your mind first, or shall I jump straight to begging? I'm all for the former, for whatever that matters...
[ kaiser is still trying to gather information on what kind of begging sae might be in the mood for. he needs to read sae's every microexpression. ]
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You can beg while I scroll. ( efficiency!
something tells him that kaiser whining into his ear will be annoying, though... he should get on his knees or something. )
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Shouldn't you at least look at my beautiful face while I beg? I feel like it should help.
[ he's just kidding, he promises. ]
Besides, you're supposed to share the doomposts with me. Read out loud a good one, I want to hear it.
[ read him the arda fanfic. ]
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( it won't. it'll just kill his boner, as is with sae and any show of vulnerability or affection...
but, sure, let him read this one: )
"I'm dying Wallahi. How can two twins be this hideous."
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[ kaiser isn't online enough to understand about the ugly twins. ]
Who are the twins? You and somebody else? Or me and somebody else?
[ unfortunately, kaiser knows there are many other white blond european strikers out there... but he's hotter than all of them!! he's trying to glance over sae's shoulder now. what does this mean?? ]
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( he doesn't really get it, either, not entirely, but — there's a logo of Re Al and Bastard on the picture, so?
that must be it?
just in case, he angles the phone a bit to show it to kaiser. maybe he'll know what it's talking about... )
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he's suicidal nonetheless, though. ]
Must be because both teams always seem to fucking bottle on the same matchdays this season... what, are you not paying attention to Bastard's fortunes now that I'm not there? Very flattering, Sae.
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( but he's not actually that interested in following other teams because he's got his own shit to deal with. maybe if madrid was doing well, and there wasn't so much behind-the-scenes drama, he'd have time... but as is, he catches up on important matches after training and lets anything unimpressive rest.
which, noel noa is not unimpressive, but when he sees a 0-0, he puts the match on the low end of the queue, and then sometimes just doens't have time — )
Which I guess I'm right about, judging by this.
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... I'd like to remain silent on the matter, in case I say something that I severely regret a few weeks from now.
[ read: if bm wins the bundesliga but rma wins nothing this season and kaiser is forced to throw himself off of his apartment balcony. ]
Show me something funny that's not about my ex, please. [ he said "please"... that means sae has to. ] Then I'll beg, how about that?
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It's kind of hard, because I don't look at shit about clubs I don't care about.
( he frowns at his phone, squinting at the screen. )
You're the one who's more up to date. You show me something funny. And then beg.