outplayed | open post / overflow

[ noa has broken the expectation that they will both watch this movie and eat ice cream first, so kaiser feels he now has free reign to continue breaking expectations as he pleases. after finishing off the ice cream and setting the empty cup aside, he fully lays onto his side to continue watching the movie, apparently unbothered by noa's lack of interest. it's still a win for kaiser because of all the screens, and the fact that he can lounge like the natural lazyass he is without the intrusive big brother-esque blue lock cameras spectating him in his more base state.

incidentally, he also enjoys the movie. he enjoys it so much that after it ends, he can't get up and start excusing himself like a normal person, he has to pull out his phone and start writing notes to dissect what he liked about it. noa may have guessed this: he is not getting out like a normal person with manners might do in a timely manner. but also, what did he expect? ]

[ time goes on with the movie as the only source of noise. there are a couple moments that snap his eyes back to the screen, as the jazz mixed with chilling riffs gets especially intense, but they quickly wander back to his tablet.

he's jotting down notes with his stylus on one half of the screen and watching the game at half speed next to it, trying to recreate the plays beat by beat. pxg versus barcha gets intense, but that's not a surprise when lavi and loki's styles aren't too dissimilar. the split system is a smart way to keep the younger itoshi and shidou from clashing. charles could use some more coaching to not lose attention though.

an english song he remembers from his youth suddenly starts to play and he glances up to see the credits. well, that's that. he wraps up his notation as they roll, waiting for silence to fill the air before pushing his seat back into place and closing the file. there's a touch of regret that shenanigans ruined his own ability to watch the film, but he can always try again another time.

as for kaiser? well. it doesn't seem like he's in any rush to leave. what did he expect indeed? noa leans into his desk, hands tucked into his blue lock branded sweater jacket. he's just standing there... menacingly... for a few seconds before- ]

Do you want anything else?

[ before he leaves. naturally. ]

[ unfortunately, kaiser can more or less identify what game noa is watching just from the background noise because he has studied every single NEL match as if he has to write a dissertation on them. he was already not well and could have his attention completely absorbed watching matches like a toddler watching cocomelon, but blue lock has made him even worse. he won't bring this up because he doesn't want to talk about it, actually.

also, kaiser isn't intimidated by noa standing over him menacingly, but this should not be news to either of them. ]

... No, I'm alright, thank you.

[ he said "thank you", he's being polite.

then kaiser rolls onto his stomach to really start laying into this journal entry. he has a lot of thoughts about what he just saw. let him take his sweet time because maybe this behavior should be encouraged? he's having deep and multilayered thoughts about something that won't deeply harm his mentality and is improving his media literacy. ]

[ no, because writing lengthy reviews in letterbox does not contribute to the constant self-improvement grindset behind kicking the ball into the goal really really good. ]

Ok. Then I'll see you tomorrow.

[ :| ]

[ it's keeping his mind more stable which helps him maintain his mindset grindset long-term, believe him!! ]

Yeahhhh...

[ he's not listening. letterbox needs to know kaiser's novel thoughts, which have probably never been thought by anybody else before. also, he wants to know how far he can continue toeing the line here. ]

[ mental stability is for ubers. breaking down mid-game and throwing away your soul for goals? that's the noel noa way. ]

Don't make me kick you out. I'm tired too.

[ peepaw needs to rest. you hit your thirties and going to bed on time becomes a top priority. ]

[ to that, kaiser looks up and his face really says it all — beautiful smile, horrible expression. do it, peepaw... he is so curious what noa's next move will be. sure, noa can absolutely scruff again him and throw him out, but the really intriguing thing is what happens the moment kaiser is through the door and the cameras are back on, because noa should be fully anticipating that kaiser will make a Thing out of this. does he want to be today's most watched clip on blue lock tv? is he willing to gamble on how horrible kaiser will or won't be about this?

kaiser's so amped for this. it's terrible, it's elder abuse... ]

[ this is why he's not going to be sad when kaiser goes to re al. the owners are going to beg him to rush to the airport and stop kaiser from getting on that plane, and noa will go but only to say "good luck" and walk off. he doesn't need this. he also knows this is where the trouble begins, with that smile, that damned smile that declares his intention to cause problems on purpose.

so what's next? ideally, he gives kaiser a reason to leave instead of forcing him out. how does he do that? the clever route might be to turn on the screens, take a seat, and just do a replay of the manshine match to see if kaiser deteriorates over getting called a clown by both him and isagi at different points. but no, he'll let kaiser be his own worst enemy in that regard.

what he's left with is being petty. first, he unzips his jacket. he's wearing a black t-shirt with the sleeves cutting off at his biceps. then he steps out of his slippers, walks to the bed and, well, he's going to just sit down directly on kaiser if he doesn't try to shove him back. awful cat meet awful dog. ]

[ that would be a fine move, but noa is right to refrain, because the person who can inflict the most mental damage on kaiser is kaiser himself; in this context, it would piss him off, but he would be able to bear it because he'd know that noa really wants him out if that's the tactic he's resorting to.

also, wow! that is not how kaiser wants his back broken! it's more undignified than he wishes it were, but he scrambles a bit to roll onto his side to prevent himself from getting sat on, though his jacket is now partially stuck underneath noa's ass. ]

Are you that tired, old man? [ let him finish his review, and the other list of things that kaiser can find an excuse to do while already on his phone. ]

Yeah.

[ no, not really. he still wants to shower, clean his sheets, do his standard nightly rituals. he is not leaving him unattended in his office though, so that means the one thing he can do is settle into bed. unfortunately this is already a small bed even for him, so kaiser is basically getting crushed against the wall. what a shame! well, he had plenty of chances to leave.

noa digs his phone out of the pants pocket and starts checking his emails. his management handles the bulk of things, so this inbox is largely for corresponding with them and club managers. he's well known for his one sentence email responses! ]

All day I need to manage not just our team, but the Blue Lock players. Not to mention being ready to play myself because my peers are desperate for their three minutes of fame. Management wants us to find a way to extend our time here because us winning all our matches is bringing in new investors. It's taxing and you're all ungrateful about it.

[ this is like, half valid venting and half nonsense that he doesn't really care about. the point is to be aggravating, not even looking at kaiser as he lists it all off. ]

Awww... [ his tone is laced with fake concern over all of this. kaiser is well and truly crushed against the wall, but as best as possible, he is attempting to curl around noa, reaching around to pat him on the leg. ] I'm so sorry, is that all really difficult for you?

[ he's not even trying to sound like he actually cares, the point is that he doesn't and he's acting it up. is this what noa wanted by complaining about his burdens? for his sweet boywife not yet even twenty years of age to comfort him with his lap and his gentle hands? kaiser wants noa to feel like an older, even more disgusting version of leonardo luna with sae itoshi at the moment. in kaiser's demented head, he imagines this is what itoshi has been groomed into, although reality probably disagrees with that. ]

You could just not play if you don't want to, I don't mind. [ because. you know. what kaiser minds is the issue here. ]

[ he just bats that hand away like he would an annoying fly, still looking at his phone. if this is at all a compromising position, he doesn't care at the moment. the do not disturb sign is still up and his office doesn't have any cctv surveillance, so he will pretend this didn't happen tomorrow. ]

Oh, but I want us to win. And I can't trust you to do it, so I need to step in. You're a burden. You're boring me.

Mm. Does saying that make you feel good about yourself? [ kaiser is NOT falling for that bait... at this point, maybe this is more a battle of endurance. who will be unable to resist the temptation to take the bait first?

anyways, kaiser is a lot of things, but "boring" is not one of them. of that, he is extremely certain. ]

Relieving stress is necessary every now and again, I guess. Alright, then keep going...

[ he's making a show of listening carefully, propping his head up on a hand and tilting his head in a way that exposes even more of the blue rose tattoo on his neck than usual. he's still clutching his phone with his other hand, but sure, letterboxd can wait. ]

It isn't about what I feel, it's just reality.

[ he's still checking emails as he speaks, starting from the bottom and working his way up. his team at least knows he hates reading blocks of text. the faster to the point, the better. ]

I brought the best u-20 players our club has and you're all dropping off. The Blue Lock players get better and you all get worse. And when I give you my time, you throw my good will back at me.

What I don't understand is why. Is it because it's me? Or do you think you're above it all?

[ excuse him?! kaiser wants to know the answer to those questions too. in fact, kaiser is pretty sure there is nobody else who is (and is entitled to be) more pissed off about the massive falloff of the u-20 bastard münchen players. he has already given grim something to really despair over, and has assured gesner that he will not know the touch of a woman until kaiser's anger has subsided — the list goes on. getting plotsagi'd is terrible work...

also, kaiser does have an answer to this — why didn't noa expect players to struggle with a brand new system after spending years embedding a different one into their brains? of course that wouldn't go well? also, when you start off from a worse position, catching up is easier than when you're trying to make improvements at the top — but kaiser is still refusing to take the bait and wants to continue playing up this role that nobody has asked him to take up. ]

Now, how could it possibly be because of you? After all, you are so very sincerely mentoring everybody with their best interests in mind, are you not?

[ noa is... isn't he? :pleading: ]

Poor you and how so very misunderstood you are. [ he's trying to not snicker... ] If you want, I can bring you ice cream again tomorrow to soothe your mental ails.

[ ah, so it's his fault. now why didn't he think of that before? he's only set up training regiments, pushed all the players in-between matches to prove their worth, and rewarded those who proved their outcomes. at the start there were hardly any of blue lock's players on the field, and now they make up the bulk of the line-up. of course that's on him, and not on prideful players who think they have no room to evolve.

it isn't about preferential treatment, it's just what the data points as the correct approach. there's no room for emotion. nobody wants to be challenged these days is the only conclusion he can reach.

as for kaiser- ]

Do you need mentorship? [ his eyes dart to the corner, then grabs kaiser's tattooed hand by the wrist and lifts it in a loose hold in-between them. ] Must I hold your hand like an attentive parent through glorified exhibition matches? Or are you still treating this like a joke?

[ kaiser wants to be offended at the implication that he is still treating blue lock like a joke when he is hard carrying the remaining german contingent at this point, but he supposes he kind of asked for that one, since he is currently electing to be a facetious menace instead of sincere. but is it not a bit cringe for him to talk about how he wants to (metaphorically) tear isagi's throat out on the pitch and eat him up like a slab of raw meat? yes? no? well. ]

Who knows, nobody's ever tried that approach on me. [ the answer is 'no', though, kaiser doesn't need to experience that to know he would hate it. ] Is this considered an attentive hand-hold?

[ it's tempting to reciprocate with every bit of his 80kg grip strength, but kaiser will refrain. he will squeeze noa's hand, though, as if testing whether he's going to be allowed to continue pushing across the line. ]

So is that it? You're feeling ignored?

[ why, because noa has been giving attention to isagi? that kid is sharp, and hungry to advance, but he's blinded by admiration and emotion. he's missing the element that he knows kaiser has but has yet to uncover. he sees what's inside him, a true beast trapped in a fragile cage, and he wants to help him break it. noa wants to fight the most vicious version of kaiser that can be found.

his hand is squeezed and noa squeezes back, matching the intensity in equal measure while knowing he can make it tighter. his eyes sharpen in the way they do when he's staring down eleven enemies, ready to dismantle their positions one by one to score. ]

You have my attention. What do you want from it?

[ (the truth he won't say yet is that kaiser was his focus from the moment they entered this facility. he doesn't care about anyone else on this team but him.) ]

Yeah. [ well, no. in fact, kaiser prefers it when noa doesn't pay too much attention to him most of the time, but kaiser has to say that just to get this uncalled for jab in: ] That's the thing about guys who pay a lot of attention to teenagers more than ten years their junior, you know? So easily distracted by a new young thing.

[ kaiser smiles horribly again. somebody who knows him well enough could probably imagine him practicing this one in a mirror — confident yet restrained, at somebody else's expense. he won't squeeze noa's hand any harder, but he does push his pinky and ring fingers between noa's for that saucy interlacing, rubbing the pad of his thumb against the muscular part of noa's palm, right underneath the thumb. he probably saw this in a movie or something, noa shouldn't read into the implications too much unless he wants to really delve into how broken kaiser came out of the metaphorical box.

also, kaiser will be sure to have a thorough cringe over this later, when certain reveals come out. ]

What does somebody want when they have a trophy? Holding it is the point, not the means.

Jealously, Kaiser? And here I thought you loathed my existence.

[ of course the jab is uncalled for, but he knows it's a cheap shot and treats it as such. it doesn't do anything to him when it's so categorically ridiculous. he feels the same way when kaiser laces their fingers and massages his palm, watching the motion the way someone observes a mildly intriguing museum exhibit. it's happening to him and isn't. there's the physical reaction of his skin being touched and not a spark comes out of it. he feels nothing.

still, if nothing else, his attention is on kaiser. his phone is screen down on his chest, though his fingers are on the back ready to bring it up at a moment. ]

I'm not of the same mind as you. Trophies are just shiny trinkets, worthless once gained. I play for greater things. You should too, if you really plan on competing against me in the future.

Edited (wording) 2024-12-10 02:25 (UTC)

Greater things? [ a scoff— ] I think we both play for baser things.

[ to assert "i exist" to everybody else in the world — because if he doesn't win, there is no point in something called "michael kaiser" existing. he imagines this is close to how noa feels about it as well.

his will to survive is stronger than anybody else's in blue lock — others have their own reasons to seek victory, and kaiser wouldn't necessarily say that his desire for victory itself is intrinsically the strongest, but he's confident that nobody else is as desperate to simply have the right to continue existing as he is — and that noa shouldn't disagree with that. ]

Don't make this sound like a noble endeavor. [ he digs his fingers into the inside of noa's palm, squeezing hard; there will probably be marks from his fingernails left behind. ] Or like there's something that I have to be grateful to you for.

[ or in other words, be fake and unnecessary with kaiser, and he will happily return the favor. sure, he started this, but kaiser has never denied being a massive hypocrite. ]

[ noa would argue there is no greater purpose than to assert one's existence. kaiser and him have very different things to prove through their play, but it comes down to that same root, the same point of origin. only those who come from nothing, and were told and reminded every day they would never be anything, understand how quickly they could lose everything. even more so in athletics, football or otherwise, where you're loved one day and scorned the next. it's why noa never cared about how his team did more than himself. if the team won, it would be because of him. if they lost, the record would show he did everything right.

kaiser digs his nails in and noa keeps his end of the squeeze firm as if it didn't happen. he feels 'pain' as a sensation and absorbs it. acknowledge, and move on. ]

Noble? No. You and I don't play for anyone but ourselves. That's how it should be. [ the ones who get the furthest are the ones with the greatest egos. there's nothing honorable about being a football player. a meaningless emotional concept. ] And as for gratitude? From you? I'm not holding my breath.

But by the time I'm done with you, you'll understand that the path you're on was built by my hands. That I showed you the way forward. And you won't be grateful, but you will know.

[ something in that phrasing visibly pisses kaiser off, based off of the way that his expression contorts. if it wasn't obvious, he'll make it clear enough right after— ]

Don't get things wrong. You might have started this, but I'm the one who says when it ends, you piece of shit master. [ when noa's done with kaiser? wrong! when kaiser is done with noa. ] Building the path for others to overtake you on is just the natural course of things, don't get all prideful about something like this.

[ kaiser will not be letting that happen to himself, though. kaiser wants to go the toni kroos route of transferring from b*yern m*nich to re*l m*drid, earning himself the ire of germany in the process, and then retiring at his peak so nobody can say they beat him at his best. he is NOT going to be paving the way, thanks very much; if he's ray dark's special investment, then he's going to pay out when his value is maxed out and not feel like he owes the world of football a single thing.

at least, that's what kaiser thinks in the moment. what he'll actually do? who knows — certainly not kaiser himself. ]

Or what, do you want me to kiss your ass over it?

[ he ignores that little jab, as that's absolutely not what he wants and never will, because he has to make one thing crystal clear: ]

You don't get to decide when we're done. We're not equals.

[ not yet. kaiser has that potential though, an ego to rival his, and noa wants it out. but he can't do it, not on his own. only kaiser can free himself and bring about his evolution. all noa can do is create the means by which it occurs.

he meant it when he said he was getting bored though. he's so bored of nothing having anyone real to threaten him. loki is the closest and what a dull joke that is, an upstart accelerating through his career because he was a born cheater. it doesn't inspire him. he feels nothing from it.

he's so sick of not feeling anything. he tightens the squeeze of their hands, calculated as is the cold and even tone of his derision. ]

You're my experiment. I'm running tests to see if you're worth keeping around. To see if you even have a chance of making it to where I am. You're still frightened though... of what? Tell me.

[ were this coming from anybody else, kaiser would laugh mockingly and tell them to knock it off with this corny shit; coming from noel noa, the words seem shockingly plausible. and how, exactly, is one supposed to react to being told that? is it a little too damaged and unhinged of kaiser to be oddly flattered by being considered noel noa's lab rat? at least his potential is being recognized, and in a way that kaiser can accept about himself. ]

I'm sure as hell not scared of you, if that's what you're getting at. [ kaiser squeezes back, unafraid of pain — but more than that, both confident that his freakish grip strength isn't going to lose and that if noa is telling the truth, then he isn't about to break kaiser's hand in a power play. ] What in the world do I even possibly have to fear?

[ he's not been seeing himself very clearly since entering blue lock, though, because the answer should be so obvious to himself. kaiser still thinks of himself as somebody who has nothing to lose, but has already begun to act otherwise. ]

Let's make one thing clear, though. I don't fear, trust, or idolize you... and I can barely scrape together the willpower to respect you. [ but a real hater recognizes another's accomplishments, so of course, kaiser begrudgingly has to show respect to the greatest in the world. ] If you want to run your shitty experiment, then isn't there clearly a better subject for your purposes?

[ kaiser's incorrect read of the situation is really tragic. he's assuming noa wants a successor, and from his perspective — well, yoichi is right there? ]

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