outplayed | open post / overflow

[ ah, so he is getting into yogurt... never mind the fact that yogurt is a perfectly normal, healthy thing for people to eat without it becoming a part of one's personality. kaiser will make a note of this and the selection of fruit, even if it ends up being totally useless information. he assumes there must be a bag of fiber-enriched granola somewhere out of sight to combo with the yogurt and berries, it just makes too much sense. ]

The rankings are for how valuable players are to a team, so it's not the same as a measure of how much promise as a striker each person has. Well, the correlation is there, but I disagree with some of the ordering.

[ kaiser doesn't feel like sharing now, but noa is simply going to have to trust that kaiser has strong and well-reasoned arguments for why his powerscaling chart is correct and better than everybody else's. for that matter, if this were a kaiser in a different mood, he would also question what use the bidding rank is if they're going to end up with, like, 6 forwards that require different team systems? but this is a kaiser sulky that he apparently isn't the new young hotness anymore and needs to eat some chocolate over it. ]

... I've always been a sloppy eater. [ this is true, but there's an implication here that it's nothing personal when it absolutely is. hmph! ] You were going to wash them anyways, what's the problem? I may as well lay down fully at this point, it's all the same.

[ he's shoving a bite of ice cream into his mouth, but the way he's looking down makes it seem like he's seriously considering it. if this would be extremely weird behavior, it genuinely hasn't occurred to him yet... ]

Uh-huh.

[ of course kaiser has his own tierlist in his deranged brain. he almost wants to ask where isagi is on that chart, but that would be a bad idea. the long game he's playing means he has to act as impartial as possible to their spats and on field insanity.

he doesn't encourage isagi to beat kaiser verbally, but by giving him more options on the field through player selection. everyone still has to prove themselves, but the good news is the blue lock kids are extremely serious about integrating into his methodology. so - pull back the players who will only work with kaiser and give isagi the ones who will only work with him. eventually kaiser will run out of viable options. from there it's either submit to isagi (never) or find a new way to survive.

in short, he needs to frustrate kaiser in ways that don't make it obvious that's the goal. verbal jabs must be kept to a minimum.

but! that doesn't extend to this sorry excuse of a living space being desecrated like this. ]

The fact that you knew I would wash them after you claimed the space... [ foul, how dare he be perceived this way. the mortifying ordeal of being known. ] All I can say is it'll be hard for you watch the movie lying down.

[ which, he will swivel his chair back to the console and take down anything related to the league and his data and so on. the media player with the movie file is booted up. he did in fact promise this time to kaiser and won't force shop talk. though he has not actually touched his ice cream yet. ]

Unless you've seen this one before?

[ honestly, isagi is pretty high up there on the internal ranking, because what kaiser thinks with his brain is different from how he feels. if anything, kaiser may be giving isagi undue attention relative to the other strikers in blue lock as he is slowly addled by the change in environment and conditions: a classic case of the frog in the bucket not noticing that the water around it is getting hotter and hotter. he basically blanked nagi out of his mind immediately and can barely remember barou's existence, so maybe his powerscaling ranking isn't quite right. but thinking about this further pisses him OFF!

that said — he knows he shouldn't try to show it much, leave noa guessing as to how infuriated he is, even if it doesn't really take much guessing at all. he plasters on a brief smile that he clearly doesn't mean, because he does not think of himself as a person who is ever happy. ]

Then move closer and make it easier on me. [ be so nice to him. he's under a lot of mental stress and he could blow at any moment. ] ... I do want to watch it properly.

[ he's strategically interlacing his sincerity in an ineffective bid to get leniency from a man who aspires to be as robot-like as possible. kaiser does enjoy impossible tasks, after all. ]

[ he very nearly considers pointing to the empty chair next to him. the one he set-up. the one kaiser could move to at any moment. that chair. why does he even bother? isagi would never do this to him.

but, he also ranks isagi lower in his own demented tierlist because he offers his hand in fealty at all times. the most 'disrespectful' he was willing to be was when he demanded hiori join the field over kiyora. an educated guess is he's a fan of "noel noa" and thus bows his head and rarely questions his authority. that sort of loyalty is nice on paper, but not what noa seeks. he doesn't want idol worship.

kaiser's constant challenges and rebellions, small and large, appeal more to noa's sensibilities. even stupid ones like this. and he could drag this out, especially with how weak the objection is, noa does have a schedule to keep. he clicks to start the film and reaches for the pint (still firm, signs of melt showing.) then he rises from his seat, so he can slide it across the short distance, and sit by the head of the cot next to his favorite monster. ]

Comfortable?

[ like this, he's looking down at kaiser from his wheeled-throne. some leniency. everyone needs little wins to not lose their mind and this means nothing to him. ]

[ kaiser narrows his eyes for a moment, very much the picture of a weird stray creature that was taken off the streets deciding whether or not he should trust the person who snatched him out of a garbage can to continue being nice to him, in spite of the fact that there is no evidence that should make him suspicious. then he opens them wide again, as it to signal that he is 100% aware of what he is doing when he slides a leg out and hooks his ankle around the base of the sliding seat, dragging it closer like this is normal behavior.

continuing to audaciously act as if this is normal behavior that people wouldn't side-eye him for, he then leans in and rests his chin at the edge of the cushioned chair, perched so that the side of his head just barely avoids getting pressed up against the armrest. he truly is some kind of shitty stray cat in behavior at times. noa can be glad that kaiser didn't straight up deposit his head into his lap and that there's still room to shift his weight to the other side of the chair, if he wants a silver lining. at any rate, this is truly unhinged stuff, done completely casually. ]

Eat your ice cream, I worked hard to find that.

[ ness did.

anyways, kaiser is beginning to eat his own cup of ice cream, so as to not be called out for hypocrisy on the matter. ]

[ he sees the hook and lets the seat slide, capable of stopping it but choosing not to. his eyes turn to the screen as the film fades into the picture, ignoring kaiser inching closer into his space even as he notices it. he's not shifting in his seat, even if that's the natural inclination in his head, out of stubbornness alone. creatures do not control his life! this is why he shouldn't own pets, but why get one when club management handed him kaiser?

but right, the ice cream. ugh. don't look at it in disdain, don't give the brat the satisfaction. he carefully digs the spoon in, chipping past the top chocolate layer and into the cream, and brings up a hearty scoop. without time to contemplate if he would like it or not, he pushes it into his mouth. it's ludicrously sweet on his tongue, though the touch of bitter helps him take the damage. his nose does wrinkle against his will for a moment before he locks his muscles down.

(did he work hard to find it or did he just ask ness to do it? he decides it isn't worth bringing up.) ]

It's ok. I'll finish it.

[ he worked hard to train ness (neither properly nor well, but it sure is some kind of training), so this is definitely a result of his hard work. ]

I mean... I'll eat it if you don't want it...

[ not that kaiser absolutely adores what he's eating, but he did want to eat ice cream, and he will more or less eat whatever. does he have some food insecure habits that lead him to sometimes eat more or less than what would seem situationally appropriate? maybe. but also, ice cream is delicious and he doesn't see the problem with eating more of it.

as he says that, though, his gaze is firmly fixed on the screen. he will, apparently, watch this movie earnestly. he hopes the movie is good, but more than that, he needs to witness some minds even more scrambled than his own to feel better. ]

If I can't finish it.

[ which is very likely going to be the case, but there's a bit of silly pride in not wanting to give it up easily. he chose to entertain this indulgence - the ice cream, movie, kaiser lounging on his bed - so he should see it through. it's important to him to be consistent, if only for himself. if he hands over the ice cream, he'll do so when he feels like he's had as much as his palette can take.

(still - he does like chocolate. it was a small luxury in childhood that his mother would get him once a month. he made it last however long he reasonably could.)

for now he'll go silent and let the film unfold. it's a slow and drawn out start, which he likes. movies that rush to grab an audience's attention don't appeal to him. a murder mystery is introduced with odd deaths on a train line, and automatically his brain wants to pick it apart to see if he can reach the answer before the movie presents it. though this means he's split between watching and remembering to take small scoops every so often, small beads of chocolate threatening to escape past the cup rim. ]

[ kaiser is locked in as well, mostly because he's immersed, but partially because he has to actively process the subtitles as he refuses to put his earbuds in... he must experience this as the director intended. his expression is different from usual; or perhaps, it's that he isn't wearing an expression at all, the way that he usually does in front of others. expressing his emotions via his face was a useless skill for the majority of his life — it wasn't until recently that he realized that's something he's supposed to do, as a form of communication. when he isn't trying, though, he looks more solemn than usual... nothing to smile about in his life.

subconsciously, he leans in slightly as the plot begins to develop, mouth opening slightly. then — a few melted drops of ice cream fall against him, his hair and the side of his face. in response, he tilts his face fully upwards without making to actually clean any of that off; he looks baleful about this, but like in a strangely normal teenaged way, instead of looking like he wants to kill somebody with a ball as he usually would. ]

Hey...

[ watch it!!!!! is what he's actually saying. do NOT break his immersion! ]

Hm. [ he glances down and immediately realizes his mistake. ] Oh, sorry.

[ careless of him. he gets out of his seat and steps to his tea/fridge set-up to pull out some napkins, a couple to set under the cup and then a few extra to clean up. he'll leave his treat behind to attend to kaiser first. he sits and turns in seat to face kaiser, then cups a hand against his cheek before a protest can be raised. ]

Hold still.

[ if this is awkward or strange, it doesn't register to noa before he leans the napkin in and starts cleaning off the liquid specks on his face. it's not great, as trying to tidy up a chocolate stain never is, but the movements are gentle and methodical. ]

[ if anybody else on the team were spectating this, they would probably be forced to rank it in the top five oddest things they've ever seen in their lives: noa holding kaiser's face and wiping his cheek like an overgrown child. kaiser not protesting, but also very much not holding still. he keeps trying to turn his gaze back towards the screen because he wants to watch movie. they are just getting to a part where he can point and say "that's just like you" in an unflattering and potentially borderline untrue, slanderous way! ]

You can leave it, I don't care. [ he wants to watch movie.

also, he used to spend most of his time dirty and laying around on the floor or the ground, he really doesn't care about chocolate stains nearly as much as his high-maintenance appearance would suggest. let him watch movie and be immersed. ]

But I do.

[ he isn't doing it for kaiser, in the way he doesn't do much of anything for anyone but himself. it'll bug him if he doesn't do some clean-up, so it'll get done until he's done or properly swiped away. the stains on the face are taken off and he'll let go of the cheek. however, then he takes a fresh napkin and dabs it against the hair. lucky the sharp blond contrast makes it easy to see where the stain is, and it's faster to remove. ]

There.

Okay, now get your face out of the way of the screen...

[ kaiser wants to appreciate the cinematography. in fact, fuck it, he's full on reaching over noa's lap and embracing having the personality of a horrible, spoiled cat as he lifts his chest across noa's legs to keep him from getting up again. or really, moving in any significant way that would prevent kaiser from his viewing pleasure. you don't get up when you want to get up: you get up when the cat on your lap permits it. ]

And finish your ice cream. [ kaiser's? long gone. ]

--Oof.

[ it's a small sound of protest, but the most he'll give. he glares at the back of kaiser's head, then stares them up to the ceiling as if to ask "god, are you there? if so - why me?"

whatever. it's awkward, but he's able to reach his ice cream from his set-up by drawing it a little closer with his fingers before grabbing it. he quickly shovels a couple scoops into his mouth to prevent any further melting, fast but efficient. the tiny brain freeze that creeps into his skull is a small price to pay for any further interruptions.

though, strangely, he enjoys it more like this. he can't be distracted by his worries when he just does it without thinking. he's not nearly as taken in by the movie as a result, but that's ok. he's a little too restless mentally for even his favorite films most days. he handles it better in a theater space, trapped in the dark, than when he knows he could be doing something more productive.

he's already thinking about taking his iPad and checking emails... well, he can't, because of a certain feral beast laying on him. while it would be easy to just pry him off, it does feel too rude after what just happened. ugh. when did he start getting soft?

so he sighs quietly and decides to try giving into the film again. the ice cream isn't done though and he doesn't think he can handle much more. the inelegant solution he decides on is to offer what remains by setting it on his knee. it won't obstruct kaiser's view, and noa won't poke him, so he just waits to see if its noticed in the periphery. ]

[ if kaiser had eyes on the back of his eyes to see noa staring up, then he would think to himself, oh, i know. he's thanking god because he's been blessed! not many people, after all, can know the pleasure of being used as kaiser's glorified cushion. he would be happy to inform noa later that he isn't even a comfortable cushion because of how muscular his thighs are, but it is what it is.

as it is, it's a good thing kaiser hasn't developed 360 vision, or else he would not be impressed by noa's attention clearly straying. but he does, in general, pay more attention to his peripheral vision than most people, without even actively thinking about it — the hazards of growing up needing to be constantly alert and ready to respond to avoidable issues. while he almost immediately notices noa's attempt to offer up the rest of his ice cream, kaiser refuses to look away from the movie; he reaches with his non-dominant hand to grope about for it, incidentally gripping noa's leg a few times before he manages to pick the cup of ice cream up.

it's melted enough that using the spoon isn't entirely useful, so he tilts his head back to sip the ice cream soup. then, continuing to be shameless, kaiser throws his arm over noa's lap next, elbow shoved against noa's thigh so that he can use the spoon properly for the rest. this is absurd behavior done so nonchalantly that it is clear kaiser truly thinks nothing of it... what is so strange about it? explain it to him in a way that he can understand. ]

[ if you can't appreciate his thighs, you can't appreciate him.

he's ready to just shove the cup into his hand when he blindly grips at his leg a few times, but instead he just moves it a little so that it slots into the hand faster. this is so absurd. who is more insane: kaiser for doing this, or noa for allowing it to keep happening?

then the elbows uncomfortably jabs him and the limits of his patience are reached. ]

Can you sit normally? [ :/ ] I won't interrupt your view of the movie anymore if that's the concern.

[ definitely noa is the less sane for this, because kaiser gets a scrap and he will latch his teeth in to guarantee future consequences. ]

What is so abnormal about this. Explain it to me.

[ say it!! kaiser isn't budging until he hears an explanation he can agree with, as unruly children often insist. he also doesn't even deign to glance up when saying this: to reiterate, he wants to watch movie. ]

You have five seconds to move before I make you move.

[ he is NOT explaining this! ]

Fine, do it.

[ he doesn't think he's calling a bluff, he's sure noa is being serious. but this is also kind of a win for kaiser: every time he annoys noa enough to make him do something like this, kaiser emotionally counts it as a victory against him. ]

[ the worst part is that noa would agree - this is definitely kaiser's win. but noa is accepting he walked into this as soon as he invited kaiser into his quarters. it was never going to end well. this is because, and noa knows best, they're both assholes who hate to lose.

so yes, kaiser can take the win in spirit. in practice, noa lifts him by the back collar with one hand and uses the other to assist with a strong shove forward. off he goes! ]

[ scruffed like a naughty cat and forced away, kaiser is nonetheless smug as can be as he plays up the force of impact, letting out a completely unnecessary but audible oof and all. but at least he doesn't struggle against his inevitable fate. ]

Be gentler with me... [ then he takes a bite of ice cream. of course, kaiser defended the ice cream perfectly throughout all of this... ] I'm more delicate than you.

[ you know, in the sense that a difference of 1 degree less technically means it's colder outside. anyways, kaiser will settle back onto noa's bed, he knows when a tactical retreat is an advantageous move. in fact, this is a good excuse to really obnoxiously settle in, pulling his knees up and all. ]

[ ok, credit when due: the fact that the ice cream survived is impressive. shame noa has no mercy in his heart, so kaiser's little false plea goes on deaf ears.

he's ready to tell kaiser to get off his bed too, but decides the brat has... well, no, he has not learned any lesson from this. noa isn't a brute though, and he doesn't want to wrestle, so he'll let kaiser settle into his bed. he's still not going to kick him out of the room even if he has all the grounds to do so. enjoy the movie!

however, now that he's free and frankly tuned out of this movie all together now, he's going to get up and grab his tablet off the console. he settles back into his seat and mutes the device, trying to decide if he wants to rewatch the pxg match versus manshine or barcha first. ]

[ noa has broken the expectation that they will both watch this movie and eat ice cream first, so kaiser feels he now has free reign to continue breaking expectations as he pleases. after finishing off the ice cream and setting the empty cup aside, he fully lays onto his side to continue watching the movie, apparently unbothered by noa's lack of interest. it's still a win for kaiser because of all the screens, and the fact that he can lounge like the natural lazyass he is without the intrusive big brother-esque blue lock cameras spectating him in his more base state.

incidentally, he also enjoys the movie. he enjoys it so much that after it ends, he can't get up and start excusing himself like a normal person, he has to pull out his phone and start writing notes to dissect what he liked about it. noa may have guessed this: he is not getting out like a normal person with manners might do in a timely manner. but also, what did he expect? ]

[ time goes on with the movie as the only source of noise. there are a couple moments that snap his eyes back to the screen, as the jazz mixed with chilling riffs gets especially intense, but they quickly wander back to his tablet.

he's jotting down notes with his stylus on one half of the screen and watching the game at half speed next to it, trying to recreate the plays beat by beat. pxg versus barcha gets intense, but that's not a surprise when lavi and loki's styles aren't too dissimilar. the split system is a smart way to keep the younger itoshi and shidou from clashing. charles could use some more coaching to not lose attention though.

an english song he remembers from his youth suddenly starts to play and he glances up to see the credits. well, that's that. he wraps up his notation as they roll, waiting for silence to fill the air before pushing his seat back into place and closing the file. there's a touch of regret that shenanigans ruined his own ability to watch the film, but he can always try again another time.

as for kaiser? well. it doesn't seem like he's in any rush to leave. what did he expect indeed? noa leans into his desk, hands tucked into his blue lock branded sweater jacket. he's just standing there... menacingly... for a few seconds before- ]

Do you want anything else?

[ before he leaves. naturally. ]

[ unfortunately, kaiser can more or less identify what game noa is watching just from the background noise because he has studied every single NEL match as if he has to write a dissertation on them. he was already not well and could have his attention completely absorbed watching matches like a toddler watching cocomelon, but blue lock has made him even worse. he won't bring this up because he doesn't want to talk about it, actually.

also, kaiser isn't intimidated by noa standing over him menacingly, but this should not be news to either of them. ]

... No, I'm alright, thank you.

[ he said "thank you", he's being polite.

then kaiser rolls onto his stomach to really start laying into this journal entry. he has a lot of thoughts about what he just saw. let him take his sweet time because maybe this behavior should be encouraged? he's having deep and multilayered thoughts about something that won't deeply harm his mentality and is improving his media literacy. ]

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